Finding Joy…

I was feeling fine this morning, tired, but fine. Then, in a matter of seconds, a minor faux pas on my part took me to that place inside where the movies play over and over again, like a Twilight Zone episode. Dwelling on feeling misunderstood, or guilty, or whatever that icky feeling is, really brought me down.

I mentioned it on my Facebook wall, and was delighted to be reminded once again that the internet isn’t always a cold, harsh, impersonal place. In fact, more often than not, I have found true friendship and caring and thoughtful support there. Some friends I have met in person, some are family, but most send their kind souls out through the magical world wide web and that is the only way we would have ever connected. I think.

One of them felt my pain as she admits to dwelling on those things herself. One put great thought and care into responding with personal anecdotes and information. And, one sent me outside. I went.

I could hear the scrub jays calling…creating quite a ruckus. I followed the sound to my pomegranate tree located at the very farthest corner of our backyard, which is hidden from easy view. When I got there, the birds had gone. But, I noticed that the fruits looked like they were ripening already.

Reaching up into the branches, I plucked one from its stem. It was quite firm and none of the fruits had split or been pecked open yet. I had to really work at it, but figured I would keep trying, just to see if it was ready to eat. To my surprise, it was!

This tree has survived a lot of neglect, being out of view such as it is. Yet, it still bears a most interesting fruit. When I planted it, I had not realized it was different than other pomegranate trees. It is unlike the gleaming, vibrant red jewels I remember from childhood…staining my hands and face and getting me in trouble with a crabby third grade teacher. No, the fruits of this tree are the softest pinks and translucent white…like tiny quartz gems all lined up in curvaceous rows. I pondered the beauty in its subtlety. I accepted its differences as being quite a blessing. As I peeled back the mysterious layers, I discovered pure JOY!

Do you see it?

Oh, and by the way, the scrub jays have not made a peep ever since!